Monday, September 22, 2008

Public Air Freshener

WARNING! This blog will be petty in nature. I will not even pretend that I don't know that it's petty, I do, regardless of this, I will proceed.
I have never been a fan of using public restrooms, I prefer the comfort and safety of my own private bathroom at home. There are times however, when the bowels or the bladder simply will not allow for waiting until you get home, today was one of those days! I've been slacking on my water intake so this morning I decided to kick it up a notch. By lunch I had consumed close to a gallon of water and I had to go reeeaaallly bad!
I work for a large corporation in a large office building so that bathroom has multiple stalls and plenty of space, no cramped little box with a toilet and a sink. One would expect that a bathroom of this size would not allow for the lingering of the foul smell of, well you know, yet today I learned that not to be the case.
Here is where my problem comes in... The company has been generous enough to provide cans of air freshener in EVERY stall in the bathroom. The cans are conveniently placed in each stall for anyone to use. On this morning, someone apparently thought there must be a CHARGE for the air freshener since they decided NOT to use it after leaving a smell in the air that ranked right up there with public landfill!! How hard is it to extend your arm, grasp the can, and push the little button??!!?? Those three simple little steps would save those that come behind you from being nauseated from the stench of what you left behind. It's free! It's PUBLIC use air freshener! Use it!
Like I said, it's petty, but I had to tell you... SOMEBODY out there needs to ponder why they don't use the public air freshener. (baffled, shaking head and walking away)

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Building My Jail

It has occurred to me that I've mastered the art of imprisoning myself. Recently I took the time to reflect on past relationships in hopes of being enlightened on why the relationships did not flourish but instead ceased to exist.
As I thought back over not so distant relationships as well as those from long ago, I could clearly see a pattern; I was clearly in a pattern of seeking relationships with the wrong people. By calling them the "wrong people" I in no way mean that the people were bad, they were simply bad for me. It must be true that as humans, we tend to want that which is not good for us; the very things that do us damage are the things that we want and seek to obtain.
In reviewing all of my past loves, I could see a common theme, I felt imprisoned. Oh they all started out as most new loves do, the excitement of someone new, the phone calls till 3 A.M. yet waking at 7 missing the person as though you had not spoken in year. The endless nights of great sex, the long walks and talks... You get the picture I'm sure. The problem I saw was that these things never lasted long and when we should have been moving into the comfortable stage of familiarity and contentment, I was moving towards feeling imprisoned.
Over and over again, I repeated the same cycle, and each time, I found ways to blame my partner. In reflections, it was clear that the things that I complained about were simply a part of that person's personality, it was who they were and had been all along. Had I taken a chance to think before plunging ahead, often aggressively chasing the person, I would have been able to see that the person was not for me. Instead, I constantly followed my feelings of immediate gratification, enjoying the thrill of the chase and the smell of victory and accomplishment once I had won their affection, blindly ignoring that these things would pass and I would need to be able to go through the routine of daily life with this person who in actuality I could not tolerate, and more than likely, they could not tolerate me.
Once the light would come on and the little things that I disliked about them became HUGE things that I hated, that familiar feeling of imprisonment would inevitably return. The bickering would become arguing, the thoughts of cheating would become true infidelity, and in my mind, I was justified because this person would not or could not be the person I thought they should be.
Each and every time, I built my own jail, brick by brick. Every time I ignored things I disliked about the person in the beginning, every time I pretended to be someone I was not to gain the affection of this person, yet knowing I could not keep up the charade, I was building my jail to imprison myself.
The next time your mind is tempted to be idle, take a minute to reflect on your past relationships, you might be surprised with what you find... Just something For You To Ponder.