Monday, July 13, 2009

The Business of Friendship

Friendship is something that many people take for granted, and tend to come to expect it as being a part of life that just exists. I do admit that I too have taken friendship for granted and many times have forgotten that it's a blessing/privilege and not a right. There are many people whose lives are void of what they can call true friends. This is not to say that they don't have people they talk to, hang out with, and socialize with in general, however, real friends far surpass those things.
Over the weekend I was fortunate to see one of my best friends whom I hadn't seen in 20 years. Although much time had passed, she and I never lost contact, always communicated via phone, email, etc, and upon seeing each other on Saturday, picked up as though we had just seen each other the day before.
There were no uncomfortable silences, no standoffish ways, just genuine friendship. As I sat catching up with her, it dawned on me that cultivating and maintaining real friendship is not a huge daunting task, if one uses the most basic things they've been taught in life. Be kind, be true, be available, be honest, be compromising, and be forgiving. I am sure there are other things that could go on the list, but those quickly come to mind.
Real friends don't have to talk every day or see each other every weekend for the friendship to remain in tact. Months or even years could pass and if a friend should call, you ear is there to listen, your laughter is there to uplift and your love and caring are there to support.
Not all things in a friendship will be smooth, there will be disagreements, sometimes major disagreements, but the beauty of real friendship is that with it comes compromise and forgiveness which provides the friendship to grow stronger instead of dissolving.
I learned this weekend that although I have made many acquaintances over the past 20 years, I have not made a wealth of real friends, and then I stopped to think, something as special as REAL friendship isn't just around every corner and will not be found in everyone.
I am thankful for those few real friends I have and cherish the bond that we've created. I am also thankful for those acquaintances that I will never share a real friendship with, as they help me to appreciate those friends that I do have.
It's not how many you have, but the QUALITY of the ones you have.
For you to ponder...


  1. Glad you had a good time catching up with friends. I can relate to this one, I'm still friends with a dude I met in 3rd grade and will probably be friends with him till death. Doesnt matter how long we go without talking, that's still my dawg! uplifting blog, hope it gets plenty of reads.

  2. I get together with three of my college girlfriends twice a year for the last 15 year or so. The ties we've built have stood up against everything you can think of. You said a mouthful, real friendship is invaluable.

  3. Penny9:32 AM

    Real friends are damn sure hard to come by so if you know you got some, treat them with respect and nurture the friendship.

  4. A good blog to start the week with NTB. First let me say that I am probably one of the hardest people to be friends with. I hold people to very high standards and can be very unforgiving on some levels. For those few people that i call friends, it is by no small task that they have earned the title. Friendship is a job, and takes work on both sides. When one person continues to fall down on the job, just like in any work place, you fire them. Good writing as always.

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